Café de Nuit

Zettaijin wrote:Allow me to hijack this thread for a few moments.

One of my 1st grade of JHS students here in Japan is particularly curious. He often enjoys picking my brain about certain topics, and he certainly has no taboos.

Here is a collection of some of his more interesting questions:

"Do you kill animals?"
"Do you kill humans?"
"Do you eat humans?"
"Do you eat human flesh?"
"Did you cook humans yesterday?"
"Have you killed Japanese children?"
"Are you killed by children every day?"
"Do you like cannibalism?"
"Have you ever seen a corpse?"

I answered yes to the last one and shocked him out of his socks.

Shocked him out of his socks huh? lol! i can almost imagine it Anime Style. XD

Zettaijin wrote:Allow me to hijack this thread for a few moments.

One of my 1st grade of JHS students here in Japan is particularly curious. He often enjoys picking my brain about certain topics, and he certainly has no taboos.

Here is a collection of some of his more interesting questions:

"Do you kill animals?"
"Do you kill humans?"
"Do you eat humans?"
"Do you eat human flesh?"
"Did you cook humans yesterday?"
"Have you killed Japanese children?"
"Are you killed by children every day?"
"Do you like cannibalism?"
"Have you ever seen a corpse?"

I answered yes to the last one and shocked him out of his socks.

Some of that kid's questions make me wonder what's going on in his head.

Same things that went through my head when I once wrote "Not afraid of maggots" in an English textbook asking "what can you do well?"

Seriously though, the kid just found an amusing way to practice his English and do what kids do best - gross stuff.

Manofevil wrote: I didn't particularly HATE the Ewok Adventure. It still had some basic underlying flavor, but even if I did, it would pale in comparison to the idea of women dressed up astar wars characters doing karaoke of THE SPICE GIRLS!! THE SPICE GIRLS!!!!

Did you ever see this French TV take on Star Wars?



Sorry for the nightmares...

Zettaijin wrote:Did you ever see this French TV take on Star Wars?

Wow, that's... well, that's just godawful... The video that is. The music is classic. I've had the Meco Disco Star Wars theme for years and listen to it often.
(I guess someone knew about Vader and 3PO having a "special relationship" even back then, huh?)

Zettaijin wrote: Did you ever see this French TV take on Star Wars?



Sorry for the nightmares...

Oh, gods! Why did I look? WHY DID I LOOK?!?!

Hmmm interesting. *isn't creeped out by that....*

Does that mean I've already failed a madness check and/or I am Jaded? xD lol

Zettaijin wrote:

Manofevil wrote: I didn't particularly HATE the Ewok Adventure. It still had some basic underlying flavor, but even if I did, it would pale in comparison to the idea of women dressed up as Star Wars characters doing karaoke of THE SPICE GIRLS!! THE SPICE GIRLS!!!!

Did you ever see this French TV take on Star Wars?



Sorry for the nightmares...

I strangely did not find this terrible. I can't believe somebody got paid to do it, but once you've seen the Star Wars ladies performing THE SPICE GIRLS, all else seems tame. Truthfully, this reminded me of a very fine short story in one of the comic books. You all will recall that is ST:TESB, C3PO was blown to pieces by stormtroopers. In the story, C3PO's remains are carted past Vader and trigger within him a flashback to the day when young Anakin Skywalker built C3PO, which, of course, had him remembering his mother and just better times. It is revealed elsewhere in another short story that a Sith Lord's Dark Side power is fueled specificly by the practicioners hatred and that Vader is made as powerful as he is within the Dark Side by his own Self-hatred. It doesn't matter what the hatred is directed against so long as it's there. That self-hatred was on magnificent display in that first short story I mentioned. Looking at this posted video, I could see a re-edit of it with the text from the short story being very potent to view. It's amazing what junk can be turned into in the right hands. Nope, I do not hate this at all.

My little school ghoul asked me the following today...

Boy:"Where are the corpses?"
Me:"What corpses?"
Boy:"Where are the corpses in your house?"
Me:"I don't have corpses!"
Boy:"(in Japanese)You said you saw corpses before!"
Me:"Not in my house!"

The boy clearly knows too much.

Zettaijin wrote:My little school ghoul asked me the following today...

Boy:"Where are the corpses?"
Me:"What corpses?"
Boy:"Where are the corpses in your house?"
Me:"I don't have corpses!"
Boy:"(in Japanese)You said you saw corpses before!"
Me:"Not in my house!"

The boy clearly knows too much.

Lime works well for dissolving the evidence. <.< >.>

The Junior Reverse Jacqueline Montarri Club
Me: wow, Kid#2, when did your feet get so big? What happened to your little baby feet?
Kid#2: I gave them to Kid#3. These are Kid#1's.
Kid#1: Yeah, I got some new ones, so I gave mine to Kid#2.
Me: aww.. nice sharing, guys.
Kid#2: We have hundreds of feet in all different sizes under our beds!
Me: ......

On gossip and how to stop it

Nikki, one of our Chinese clerks, likes to joke around with mildly flirtatious humor.

"Hey Bing, what are you doing for Valentine's Day? Anything with a special someone? "

"Hey, Bing, it's Tracy's birthday, write something in her card. Just make sure it's not too romantic or amorous, okay? "

"Hey, Bing, do you have an online dating account? Do you have to empty out your inbox a lot? Must be inconvenient for you." (Editor's note: I don't, I don't, and it isn't.)

Now I appreciate a joke as much as the next guy, but Nikki's wide-eyed playful humor was starting to get stale. Not only is she a decade younger than me, but I'm her supervisor and that sort of joke could easily turn sour in a workplace.

Later on, I told LomboDot about this and asked for her insight, because as my girlfriend she'd be able to give me straight advice, and as a Chinese woman about a decade younger than me she'd be able to see what Nikki's deal was.

"Oh, she's probably just sheltered and thinks she's being terribly edgy," LomboDot said airily. She had seen Nikki's resume and was not particularly worried about any threat from those quarters.

The following day, Nikki saw me leaving early, as I was going to the dentist for two annoying cavities.

"Hey, Bing, you going on a date? See that special somebody?" she asked coyly.

"You know, I have a girlfriend," I said.

"Yah but maybe you go on special date with her, be together with her at last?" she wheedled.

I made a face of faint confusion.

"She lives in my house," I said.

Nikki stopped. "Oh," she said in a very different voice.

And that was the end of it.

*drum drum crash!*

On Farewells

LomboDot's visa is about to expire, and the primary legal routes to her continued stay in the US are either finding a job or finding a husband.

On the job front, she's been applying to manY different prospects, but none of them are particularly well suited to her. On the husband front, well, I like to think that the inverse is true.

Regardless of the future potential, we are both agreed that our current relationship is the best ten months that we've ever spent with a significant other. However, we are also both agreed that ten months is not long enough to decide on "till death do us part".

LomboDot is looking forward to returning to China as an accomplished, accredited academician with foreign expertise. I'm looking forward to watching her grow her career and develop as a person. Part of me marvels that she's way ahead of me when I was her age, and there's the quiet confidence that she's going to go on to do inspiring things.

In a minefield like this, it's refreshing to know you're sharing a viewpoint so closely that there's no chance of a catastrophic misunderstanding.

For example:

LomboDot: Thank you for not asking that question with the impossible answer.

HMB: ...Is there a God?

LomboDot:

And then she thumped me.

"The question with the impossible answer..."

Be afraid. Be very afraid. I'm very attached to my bachelorhood and whenever a woman brings up that question, especially my mother, I can't get away fast enough. So what if my kitchen gives women nightmares? Or there are things in my fridge that have evolved into intelligent life forms? Or my unwashed underwear had to be beaten back with a golf club after it tried to attack my cat? I'm in no hurry for the old ball-and-chain.

...Okay, so maybe I should do laundry once in a decade.